So what is it really?
In an organic, environmentally friendly packaged, virtue signalling nutshell, I believe the point of all of this ultra spirtual-ness is so you get to reduce the struggle and suffering you are experiencing with yourself and life
Life on earth can be colourful, with all the highs and lows, challenges and surprise twists and turns. Especially with outer world stage ramping up the catastrophic news headlines at the moment. Do we all have the correct tools and information to help us navigate our way through this terrain? Life can be painful, but are we required to prolong the suffering or even mis-use these practices as a way to numb or force our way through to the end of our lives?
"Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional"
a Buddhist quote... apparently
Most of us are coping or pretending we're fine. But in actuality the shame and guilt of not having it all sorted already has us stopping the deep healing process.
(A note on quotes, some people seem to value or devalue the statement based on its source. So what if the inspiration is contained in the statement itself and not weighted on where it came from?)
Healing is an inside job
For the purposes of blog, let's reference this whole thing as inner-enquiry
From my observations and experience, all these forms of spiritual tie-dye packaged sessions all have some form of inner enquiry process which involves:
Some spiritual teachings (fuzzy reference, I know!) say the healing occurs when the observer sees the self or many selves from a higher perspective without judgement. Or another way of saying that is when the observer can perceive the self (selves) as they are without wanting to change it.
"Oneness is the allowance of everything, and the judgement of nothing"
- Access Consciousness
With that said, the observer is often inspired to make a conscious choice to be or do something different from the awareness gained. More on that later on change and choice.
This 'shadow work' is allowing for what was unconscious to become more conscious. What was in the dark now comes to light. What was misunderstood, now has a newfound perspective.
People who embark on this journey will come across the notion that our outer worlds reflect our inner worlds and that the realisation is that we can only change what is within us. As a friend calls it - 'fractal responsibility' where tending to our inner landscape becomes our priority.
This attention that is turned inwards, is about perceiving and observing the self often in relationship with another entity - past, present or future. How do we relate to things. Where the entity can be but not limited to the following:
The 10 'why's' of inner-enquiry
If coming out of struggle is not enough of a motivating force for you, why would anyone want to do this work?
My motivating force was more like me being thrown into this work from an unexpected external circumstance which had me knee deep into all things healing and self-enquir-y. I have heard similar stories from others that they experienced a 'spiritual emergency' that prompted (forced them on) this journey. Others have simply been curious about the mystical ways of the world coming with a philosophical pondering approach.
Below are some of the changes I have noticed within myself as well as heard from other people who embark on this journey. (In no particular order)
1. It puts you back in the drivers seat of your life with a sense of purpose
As you be the space of allowance of the observer of you, you can become aware of unhelpful unconscious patterns that have been running your life. You move more into choosing conscious choices - rather than being run by old outdated patterns. Meaning that you choose your choices fully for you, not one of those virtue-signallingy-holistic-ballistic choices. The child you is seen, and the adult you kicks into lead.
You feel lighter and freer to make the choices you want to make and you move with a sense of purpose. Where purpose does not have to be a set 'I'm going to heal the world' declaration, but that one has a sense of choosing to fully live life however they want to
What if purpose is saying yes to your choice?
2. Opportunities and possibilities flow to you with more ease
Being 'in flow' is a common trait with inner healing. Less efforting and struggling and more ease is experienced. You start cutting out the BS-doubtful-dilly-dallying choice making and people out of your life and move into effortless flow of choices.
The more you do this work, the more space of ease you are creating for yourself and one is more open to receive different options that you perhaps previously overlooked, missed or did not think was possible. You move from 'it's not possible for me' to 'anything is possible for me'
3. You are not at the cause and effect of other people's choices, comments or emergencies
Many people have underlying stress and anxiety running in the background impacting their nervous systems without realising it. That was me, my body was always on alert to do as I was told, for someone might get hit or told off if they didn't and so would necessarily carry out tasks for other people or correct myself to be 'right' in their eyes. The ever so helpful person who then became burnt out and lost all sense of self.
Whatever that old programme may be for you, it can be unknowingly triggered by external circumstances such as other people's demands and emergencies, or you know, like global threats to humanity, leaving you constantly at the whim of other people's needs, rules and agendas. Other people's emergencies are not necessarily your priority.
With less triggers in the world, one is able to respond appropriately in life and be able to set healthy boundaries in life rather than be coerced into subconscious reactions
4. It can set your ancestors and your children free(r)
Our family lines may be carrying, unprocessed trauma and burdens which have you playing out the stories of yesteryear without any specific reason. There can be a heap of expectations, projections and conclusions of how to be, where to be, what to be and why to be. "Only stick to your own kind and don't trust anyone" can be an interesting cultural pain-body hangover from the unsettled settlers around the globe.
When you set yourself free from an inherited outdated belief, it allows others to unsubscribe from those same limiting stories. Like a television channel no-body is interested in watching anymore, it has to be decommissioned. (This actually happened at a place I worked at!)
Honoring your ancestors does not have to mean you have to live out their unprocessed stuff and one can relieve your children from that patterning through this work.
5. Improves your relationships
Similar to the point above, you set other people free from your charged projections of them and even potential people that come into your life. For example, processing the hurt around "They are always dominating the conversation" means that you're not holding them in that position or that they take up your space in your world anymore. Can they be anything else, if we keep projecting that is always true?
It does not mean people stop being mean and hurtful, but you can at least respond differently to their state of being, and actually see where they are functioning from and make a choice. (Hence point 3)
Everybody gets to be free to be who they choose to be, arsehole or not
6. You move more into inspired creativity and come away from problem seeking
Becoming aware of the subconscious dialogues gives us more insight into how we are or were wired and fired. What or who drives us in life? Are you choosing in fire-fighting mode or from a space of inspiration that moves us into action?
The work of Bert Hellinger (family constellations) observed that we will do anything in order to belong to a family system. Even if it meant taking the place of a missing family member or paying for the misfortunes or carrying out deeds for those long past. Whose war are you fighting or revenging for?
The common subconscious dialogues have worse case scenario dangers running "What else is going to go wrong? Who is my enemy"
With less pre-programming, we can have more space for awareness and inspired actions to arise that are expansive for self and others "what is required right now if anything at all?"
7. More love and kindness, less shame and blame
One major thing I have noticed within myself with this work, is there is definitely a lot less self-sabotage-imposter syndromey-self judging-shaming chatter in my head taking me down a pit of despair.
There are a whole lot more loving and joyful impulses in my life from this inner work as I give space for all the unprocessed parts of self that want to be seen for what they are.
More loving, uplifting fun people have come into my life and existing relationships have softened
I have to caution that the crafty voice can still pop up, wanting me to 'just drive off the road and be done with it' . The major difference is that I am not sucked down a spiral anymore and can see it for what it is. (Will have to write a separate blog for this!)
You don't have to prove or validate yourself to anyone anymore. You get to try new things without worrying about getting it wrong or failing.
8. Experiences beyond expectations
Which brings us nicely to this point of allowing yourself to experience and explore people, places and situations with less expectations of the where's, how's and why's. If you choose to, one can have experiences and interactions that go way beyond expectations. Generating a richer life in all senses of the word. Being with the flow of magic unfolding in the (sometimes annoyingly allusive) NOW moment.
I have certainly gone beyond all my pre-conceived ideas of who or what I was going to be when I 'grow up'. There's always more to explore and experience
9. More energy and vitality for your life and living
This ties in with being in the flow of life where choice points and experiences are congruent with the truth of who you are (in the moment of course). I have been led to believe that tiredness, stress and pain are all indications that we are holding, doing or carrying out things that are not true for us anymore.
Who or what is weighing you down?
You get have you
You get a sense of self
You have your back
You get to be YOU
For those already on their inner-enquiry journey, what else have you noticed?
Yee Ley x
Explorer of Consciousness
Facilitator of Possibilities
More to follow on from this topic including:
What strategies are you using, to avoid and/or defend the core wounds, are you choosing?
Through the various healing modalities I've experienced and currently utilising, I've noticed that there is this thing called 'core strategies'. As I do more of this work, the more clearly I can see its function and how it has been serving the self.
In the context of the healing process these strategies are what we use as a means to protect our unprocessed core wounds.
Most people feel like they have lost their sense of self, as the strategies become the everyday norm of functioning and applied in many areas of our lives. Some of us are toggling between all these levels being triggered left right and centre and so it feels like situations are happening to us rather than for us.
The strategies are sometimes referred to as the ego or pattern. It's not necessarily the substance or activity itself that is the strategy, it is how it is applied. Examples of strategies can be:
- Busyness - filling one's life with chores, tasks & hobbies, excessive talking
- Addictive behaviors - drug & alcohol abuse, screen addiction, gym junkies, attending workshops etc
- Saviour behaviours - always wanting to assist or help others, feeling like you have to put on a happy front all the time
- Controlling situations and/or people's behaviours, talking over people
- Avoidance or checking out of conversations, not being present with other people, quietness
There's possibly more you recognise
The core wounds for me are the unprocessed, unaddressed events that have created a trauma in the energy field for that person which can be of a physical, mental, emotional or spiritual nature.
You may see people functioning from this 'hurt' space.
Where we can function in life with our core healthy sense of self
With the correct environment that invites the ripe moment, beautiful awarenesses can take place for us which gives space for the strategies and core wounds to be acknowledged for what it is.
Our Core Self is always there and for some people, a realisation that our true essence is of an infinite nature and is in allowance of all these parts to show up.
There are so many different ways to tend to our strategies, wounds and core self - from meditation, systemic constellations, shamanic journeys, body work and more. What does your body and being require for this to be with ease and grace?
So if you're feeling stuck in life, wondering why you're always being triggered and/or situations keep repeating themselves, be aware of where you are functioning from in that moment. What is coming up in your field?
Perhaps there is an old strategy or core-wound that is required to be seen and acknowledged now.
The only way out is in. (look inwards)
The only way in is out. (expand outwards)
How much ease can you have with all of that?
#innerchild #lightyourlife #wellness #wellbeing #itsokaynottobeokay #breakthepattern #mentalhealth #innerwork #awareness
Do you know where you are functioning from, and what you require in that space?
Do you know where are you at now, and what you require to shift gears?
When life throws curve balls at you, are we all equiped with the appropriate tools and information to navigate our way through that with ease? Or is it a constant struggle, being faced with yet another metaphorical egg your face? After tripping over several times in my own life, I'm getting better with navigating my way through this life with less damage to myself and others, creating more lightness in my life as I use the tools I've gathered along the way. I'm still learning and gathering more intel, as new hurdles come up! After going through a few trips, I began to notice familiar phases of this 'getting through life' business.
From my own experience and observations of clients stories, the phases we can experience on varying levels of intensity are:
So whether that's you, a client or a friend that is going through this, I find it useful to know where one is at, so we can communicate accordingly and pull out the appropriate tools for the occasion.
There is no phase to achieve or stay at, as life will tend to steer us into another experience to give you feedback on how ya doing. I've experienced cycling through all 4 phases in 1 day so you can have mini cycles as well as larger cycles through these life phases. For me it's about refining one SELF, letting go of what no longer serves, and being adept at navigating your way through obstacles and any monsters that may appear on your path.
Life Alchemy is about creating and generating the life you truly desire. Putting you back in the drivers seat of your life. So in this article I'd like to share those different phases I've experienced and observed, and what one can be and do in those phases.
Let's look at WELLNESS - aka 'first aid' required:
These are individuals that are experiencing one or many of the following: illness, physical dis-ease, stress, hurt, anxiety, trauma, chaos, overwhelm, tiredness, confusion, pain or depression.
These people want to be nurtured and looked after. The are feeling low mood wise and/or energy wise. Sometimes these people just want a hug and be held.
They will not be in the mood to hear 'just fake it till you make it', or 'just be happy', and will probably want to punch you in the face if you suggest 'hey, chin up, life is not that bad' or 'you create your own reality'
These people will be looking for a sense of wellness in their life, and require input from specialists, medical experts, wellness practitioners, counsellors, healers, or therapists etc.
They will benefit greatly from support from others and are perhaps learning how to receive and learning how to put themselves first.
What can you be or do here?
This SELF AWARENESS phase is where the individual is ready to receive the awareness of what their choices have been creating in their life thus far. The individual feels ready to have a look at self and the role they had played a part in the past & in current situations.
They are willing to have self-responsibility of their life and perhaps looking at healing deeper ingrained unhealthy patterns.
In this phase, people are ready to try out some tools for themselves, so they can feel empowered to make inspired choices to help them come unstuck. They may be still triggered and still require 'first-aid' as they get used to self-development and self-awareness.
They may open up to vulnerability and be able to share with others in a group setting. They are ready to attend classes, courses, retreats to help them better understand themselves and others.
What can I be or do here?
This phase is where individuals are ready to take leadership and ownership for their choices in life.
They are more aware of their awareness. They are aware of the energy signals they are sending out. They are keen to access more tools to upkeep their mental hygiene.
They are ready to go deeper with their healing journey and ready to face what was previously too difficult or too painful to look at before.
They are ready to explore what else is possible in the world and dare to go beyond a little bit further outside their comfort zone. They may even want to share their experience and learnings with others or up level their business in some way.
Being aware of ones choices and coming out of the judgement of those choices allows for conscious-creation or 'conscious-choicing'.
What can I be or do here?
Perhaps you are a parent, a teacher, a healer, an activist, a painter, a musician, a politician and so on. There are many roles to play and we can have multiple roles with many different actors in our play.
Most people on the planet are 'In-story' and that's okay, that is part of the game of life. Except for when it's not working for you anymore! When you are 'in story', the other phases above can apply to this phase too. One can be:
- 'in-story' and require wellness, or
- 'in-story' and self awareness, or
- 'in-story' and conscious creation
Here are some questions you can ask yourself when in-story:
What can you be or do here?